Back in time

So there I was, having a nice afternoon stroll through the woods, just taking in the birds and my ice cream, and thinking about how nice 90 degree weather is and wondering whether it was going to storm, when I heard a noise.

Now, noises don't normally faze me much, I grew up in the middle of nowhere, I've dealt with bears, moose, wolves, bobcats, all that good stuff. But this was different, and I was curious, so I turned the corner, and suddenly I was face-to-face with this asshat!

I was stunned, because I'd never seen a real, actual Tyrannosaurus Rex before, and this one looked at me like he wanted nothing more than to ruin my day. So I took his picture, and then I said to the dinosaur, "Hey, dinosaur, you'd better get away from me, because if you don't I'm going to kick out all of your teeth and you'll be sorry!" and the T. Rex looked at me, and I looked right back at him, and suddenly he roared right in my face!

So I said to the dinosaur, "Uh-uh, boyfriend, it don't work like that! Do you know where you are? This is the 21st goddamn century, you're on my turf!" and I snapped my fingers in a sassy 'Z' formation. And the T.Rex looked at me, and I looked at him, and finally he turned away and I walked right on by him.

...And that's the story I plan to tell my 4 year old niece when I show this picture in a couple days. :3